I’ve screwed up this week.
I haven’t tracked very well. Holidays are tough! So many good things around and I’m having a hard time saying no. I’m hoping to get my act together today because yesterday was a food fest.
We have had a busy week and have a busy week coming up.
Monday we go to the fertility doctor to discuss the results of all the tests I’ve had over the last month and I may be emotionally eating to calm myself down about it. It’s so final in my mind, that the results of a few tests will determine whether or not we expand our family. Lately I’ve been trying to smile through the ignorance of people who tell me “Well when you stop trying you’ll get pregnant!”. Sigh. Getting pregnant is not the problem at all. Matt sneezes on me and I get pregnant. Staying pregnant is the issue and no amount of prayers or positive thinking or “just relaxing” will change that. Modern medicine might, though.
Also, as petty as it sounds, I look like hell. One of the first things the fertility clinic told me was to stop coloring my hair so I look unkept. Apparently hair color is a hormone disruptor. Who knew? I have bad root rot and the appearance of “letting myself go”. My great friend Michelle reminded me that we always think it’s worse than it actually is. Right now I’m lying to myself and telling myself “It kind of looks ombré.” Yeah. It doesn’t, yall.
I’m also not supposed to be drinking but I caved and had a beer out to lunch the other day. No regrets. One beer won’t derail the fertility train, me thinks. It was a local Oktoberfest and I had to have it.
But the hair. I plucked a long grey. And my forehead is in dire need of some Botox.
If a baby is the end result of looking bad, I’ll take it.
Here are some shots from our fun family days this week. I’m looking forward to relaxing and spending time with family for thanksgiving. I’m also looking forward to learning what changes Weight Watchers has in store for the new year. I’ve heard rumors, but I want to hear it from oprah’s mouth.
Nothing is less relaxing than having someone tell you to relax. Ugh.